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Lake Noir

USA 2011
produced by
Matthew May, Michael J. Gonzalez (executive), Abel Martinez jr (executive), Jeffrey Schneider (executive) for Masch Productions, WJD Films, No Surrender Media Group, MDM Films
directed by Jeffrey Schneider
starring Heather Wakehouse, Geno Romo, Michelle Damis, Marzell Sampson, Bob Olin, Varrel Crumlich, Jessica Fulks, Nina Tomica, Cindy Millan, Phil Dupont, Michael J. Gonzalez, Benjamin Farmer, Calvin Morie McCarthy, Hai Ninh, Angela Valdez, I.W. Lewis, Abel Martinez jr, Shannon Rempel, Linda Nisley
written by Abel Martinez jr, music by Bentley Michaels, special makeup effects by David Sherman

review by
Mike Haberfelner

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A bunch of teens (Heather Wakehouse, Geno Romo, Marzell Sampson, Varrel Crumlich, Jessica Fulks, Nina Tomica, Cindy Millan, Phil Dupont) decide to spend the weekend at a lake, camping, partying and ... well, you-know-what. Sure, they are warned by an oldtimer (Bob Olin) that the lake is haunted since a guy was murdered and his girlfriend was forced to watch while being raped ... but hey, that's only an urban legend, right?

And at first, the location seems ideal, and the worst thing that happens is that Sean's (Geno Romo) girlfriend Ashlynn (Heather Wakehouse) won't have sex with him, not before they are married anyways. Sure, she's willing to do "that thing with her head", but that gets stale after a while, doesn't it? And damn, Sean is so horny he even shags the girlfriend of one of his friends, just to release the pressure. But once he's back and busy convincing Ashlynn that having sex isn't the worst thing that can happen, and while all their friends are away in the bushes doing like the bunny rabbits, a grotesque looking serialkiller (Michael J. Gonzalez) shows up and slashes his way through the teens - until they are down to only Sean and Ashlynn ... but what's the killer's secret? Why does he have a special fondness for Ashlynn? And what does her mother (Michelle Damis) have to do with all of this?

 

Lake Noir is a movie slasher fans will no doubt love: It follows the formula rather strictly, features gory murders, a grotesque killer, sudden shocks and plenty of suspense. Plus of course a good location and the mandatory topless nudity.

That's not to say though that Lake Noir is a perfect movie - Basically, the film is just what it is, a slasher movie, nothing more, it doesn't think outside the box or add anything of substance to the formula, it's just a bit too content with being nothing more than a slasher movie ... and that's exactly why slasher fans will love it!

 

review © by Mike Haberfelner

 

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Thanks for watching !!!

 

 

In times of uncertainty of a possible zombie outbreak, a woman has to decide between two men - only one of them's one of the undead.

 

There's No Such Thing as Zombies
starring
Luana Ribeira, Rudy Barrow and Rami Hilmi
special appearances by
Debra Lamb and Lynn Lowry

 

directed by
Eddie Bammeke

written by
Michael Haberfelner

produced by
Michael Haberfelner, Luana Ribeira and Eddie Bammeke

 

now streaming at

Amazon

Amazon UK

Vimeo

 

 

 

Robots and rats,
demons and potholes,
cuddly toys and
shopping mall Santas,
love and death and everything in between,
Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

is all of that.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to
-
a collection of short stories and mini-plays
ranging from the horrific to the darkly humourous,
from the post-apocalyptic
to the weirdly romantic,
tales that will give you a chill and maybe a chuckle, all thought up by
the twisted mind of
screenwriter and film reviewer
Michael Haberfelner.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

the new anthology by
Michael Haberfelner

 

Out now from
Amazon!!!