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Nudist Colony of the Dead

USA 1991
produced by
Mark Headley, Tom Naygrow (executive), Phil Vigeant (executive) for Artistic License, Pirromount
directed by Mark Pirro
starring Deborah Stern, Tony Cicchetti, Rachel Latt, Braddon Mendelson, Peter Napoles, Steve Wilcox, John McCafferty (as John Paul Mack), Bea Lindgren, Bruce Brown, Dave Robinson, Forrest J Ackerman, Dan Hartel, Marcus Aurelius Daniels, Darwyn Carson, Heather McPherson, Barbara Dow, Kim Kingsley, Jim Bruce, Juan Tanamera, Rachel Gordon, Mike Hall
written by Mark Pirro, songs and music by Gregg Gross, Joyce Mordoh, lyrics by Mark Pirro, special effects by Sam Cicchirillo/Mind's Eye Effects

review by
Mike Haberfelner

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Judge Rhinehole (legendary Forrest J Ackerman) closes down a nudist colony after numerous pointless complaints from church folks - but hey, the judge is one of the church-people's uncles, sooo ...

The core group of nudists though don't want to go on with their lives without the colony, so they decide to commite collective suicide - but not just to die, but to come back as zombies and kill all the church folks who might try to make the land the colony was located on their own.

Indeed, the church is quick to turn the place into a bible camp for wayward teens, and weirdly enough, all the reports of strange goings-on in that camp are suppressed - like never anybody coming back ...

Shelly (Deborah Stern), a very normal teen with a very healthy interest in sexual matters, is sent to the camp with the latest group of "sinners" - totally against her will, because the indoctrination that group tries to perform is way against her (or any sane human being's) better judgment. But after the first night, it doesn't seem too bad anymore because the two minders (Bea Lindgren, Darwyn Carson) are gone. Cool ... until their severed heads are found in the pool, and other body parts elsewhere. And while Shelly and a few friends try to find out what's going on, nudist zombies take out pretty much everyone else in the camp. Now Shelly and a motley crew of weirdoes are on the run, but most of them fall prey to their own stupid belief or just stupidity, which the nudist zombies play on. Ultimately, only Shelly is flown out of the disaster area by helicopter.

After her ordeal, Shelly wants to go one-on-one with the reverend (Dave Robinson) who sent her (and so many others) to the place ... to find out he's actually one of the nudist zombies in disguise.

 

In a way, the title Nudist Colony of the Dead might promise more than it delivers, the actual nudity in this film is strictly topless level, and there's not too much of that, either. As a matter of fact, in terms of nudity, the movie's very tame and in line with the nudist colony movies from the 1950's and 60's more than anything since. And what you might not have guessed from the title, this movie has several musical interludes, simplistic and innocent but sort-of catchy pop tunes, not all that well sung but well enough placed to serve as an ironic counterpoint to the goings-on, and in fact they are quite a bit funnier than some of the moronic humour this movie's driven by (though there are occasional comedic gems in there somewhere, too).

In all, I guess it's an ok party movie, and while I have certainly been entertained better by other low budget genre comedies, there also waaay worse (and bigger budgeted ones, too) out there.

 

review © by Mike Haberfelner

 

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In times of uncertainty of a possible zombie outbreak, a woman has to decide between two men - only one of them's one of the undead.

 

There's No Such Thing as Zombies
starring
Luana Ribeira, Rudy Barrow and Rami Hilmi
special appearances by
Debra Lamb and Lynn Lowry

 

directed by
Eddie Bammeke

written by
Michael Haberfelner

produced by
Michael Haberfelner, Luana Ribeira and Eddie Bammeke

 

now streaming at

Amazon

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Vimeo

 

 

 

Robots and rats,
demons and potholes,
cuddly toys and
shopping mall Santas,
love and death and everything in between,
Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

is all of that.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to
-
a collection of short stories and mini-plays
ranging from the horrific to the darkly humourous,
from the post-apocalyptic
to the weirdly romantic,
tales that will give you a chill and maybe a chuckle, all thought up by
the twisted mind of
screenwriter and film reviewer
Michael Haberfelner.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

the new anthology by
Michael Haberfelner

 

Out now from
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