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Four years ago, Candy (Melinda Clarke) and Johnny (Jason Durr) robbed a
bank, but then Johnny got caought and went to prison while Candy hid out
in a convent/gas station in the New Mexico desert.
Now though, Johnny is to be released in four days, and Candy leaves the
convent, and all that's left to do for Johnny, it seems, is to not fall
out with the sadistic warden (Robert Englund) while Candy has to fight off
two former accomplices (Michael Cule, Nigel Whitmey) they tricked out of
their share ... which is when a meteor hits the earth, and somehow, Candy
actually eats some of it with her soup while her dogs, four ugly poodles,
get some in their food as well - and poof, the four poodles turn into
humans, and not only that, drag queens as well, while Candy grows a
several feet long, carnivorous tongue that has a mind of its own, can talk
and has a predilection for eating humans. At first, Candy totally freaks
out and tries to get rid of the tongue, but gradually she accepts it, and
the two even become lovers (!) ...
At the same time, the warden thinks of more and more tricks to keep
Johnny from being released, which ultimately leads to Johnny's only
moderately successful escape as well as Candy laying waste to the prison
he was at ...
Johnny ends up in the desert, gravely injured when he meets nun Rita
(Mapi Galán), who has developed healing powers thanks to the meteor - and
the two end up in bed in the middle of the desert doing you-know-what,
when Candy finally catches up with Johnny, and finding him shagging Rita -
even if it's only for healing purposes - immediately cools off her
feelings towards him and she now wants him dead.
The ending has Johnny and Rita teaming up with the Rita's fellow nuns
and of all people the warden to fight Candy and her drag queens.
It all ends with the drag queens being blown up and Candy's tongue
being chopped off, which turns her back to normal - but still, Johnny
decides to stay with Rita, who has after all saved his life in the desert
...
I have to admit, the stills, the artwork and the trailers of this film
look amazing, Melinda Clarke in a black latex outfit with a tongue of
several feet is a sight for sore eyes, and Mapi Galán in ever briefer and
more fetishistic outfits is quite a piece of eyecandy as well. And quite
apart from that, to people like me, a film about a woman with an elongated
carnivorous tongue promises great entertainment.
Unfortunately though, Killer Tongue does not live up to its
promises, instead of relying on its great basic premise, the film tries
everything to be especially funny, no silly joke is left out,
bathroom humour roams wild in the film, all performers play it totally
over-the-top, sometimes painfully so, plus the script seems to lose
direction several times along the way, and apart from all that, the last
thing a film about a woman with a killer tongue needs is bad drag queens.
A pity, this one could have been so good.
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