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Mädchen die sich selbst bedienen

Self Service Girls

Switzerland 1974
produced by
Erwin C. Dietrich für Elite Film AG
directed by Erwin C. Dietrich
starring Marianne Dupont, Alexander Falken, Claudia Fielers, Christa Free, Eric Falk, Bruno Huber, Roman Huber, Michel Jacot, Michele Marcelle, Monika Rohde, Martine Stedil
written by Erwin C. Dietrich (as Manfred Gregor), music by Walter Baumgartner, cinematography by Peter Baumgartner

review by
Mike Haberfelner

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A guy goes to a peep-show to look at a series of stories:

- A girl goes bowling with a bunch of guys, but is not so much interested into the game as such but into satisfying the guys sexual desires in a private back-room. For some reason though, none of them gives her a real orgasm so she in the end has to masturbate.
- While he is in the operating theatre, a nurse takes a liking to a patient & that night visits him in his room to make out.
- A woman meets a man in a sauna & comments on the size of his penis. She invites him to sculpt him (yes, she is a sculptress) in the nude (meaning, for some reason, both of them are nude), but actually she only sculpts his penis, until he can't resist her seduction any longer & fucks her..
- In an aeroplane, a guy picks up a stewardess & fucks her in a restroom.
- A guy (Eric Falk) watches porn cartoons from the silent era (looks like a hardcore parody of Mutt & Jeff). When his (female) neighbour comes home, he watches her through a hole in the wall as she undresses & masturbates. Then he watches some more vintage film (this time real-life hardcore), until his neighbour (still nude) comes over & they have sex.
- A guy practices his violine-playing, which causes his (female) neighbour to undress & masturbate.
- A guy can't sleep due to his neighbours' loud fucking. So he, the next day, records a 4 hour audio tape with fake fucking noises to keep them awake the next night. The woman gets so turned on by these noises that she (in the nude of course) sneaks over to him to get a good fucking, but he ejaculates prematurely. She then ccrawls back on all fours, backwards, only tosuddenly feel her husband's penis on her backside, ready & waiting.

... our voyeuristic hero then leaves the peepshow only to stop again at the sexshop's window, staring at vibrators & fantasizing about their use - while he pumps up his bikes flat tire.

 

Silly vintage erotica, there for no other reason than to show naked women - which of course explains the very poor excuses for plots that make up the stories. It's fun though, if you're into that kind of movie & don't take it seriously at all.

The sex by the way, is strictly softcore, except for the sequence in which Eric Falk watches vintage porn. For some reason, the vintage material is deintitely hardcore.

 

review © by Mike Haberfelner

 

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Thanks for watching !!!

 

 

In times of uncertainty of a possible zombie outbreak, a woman has to decide between two men - only one of them's one of the undead.

 

There's No Such Thing as Zombies
starring
Luana Ribeira, Rudy Barrow and Rami Hilmi
special appearances by
Debra Lamb and Lynn Lowry

 

directed by
Eddie Bammeke

written by
Michael Haberfelner

produced by
Michael Haberfelner, Luana Ribeira and Eddie Bammeke

 

now streaming at

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Vimeo

 

 

 

Robots and rats,
demons and potholes,
cuddly toys and
shopping mall Santas,
love and death and everything in between,
Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

is all of that.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to
-
a collection of short stories and mini-plays
ranging from the horrific to the darkly humourous,
from the post-apocalyptic
to the weirdly romantic,
tales that will give you a chill and maybe a chuckle, all thought up by
the twisted mind of
screenwriter and film reviewer
Michael Haberfelner.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

the new anthology by
Michael Haberfelner

 

Out now from
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