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Love Feast

Pretty Models... all in a Row
The Photographer

USA 1969
produced by
Joseph F. Robertson for Robertson-Kay Productions
directed by Joseph F.Robertson
starring Ed Wood, Casey Larrain, Heather Starr, Lynn Harris, Mia Coco, Neola Graef, Linda Colpin
written by Ed Wood, Joseph F.Robertson

review by
Mike Haberfelner

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Murphy (Ed Wood) has his very own way to pick up beautiful girls: He poses as a photographer, hires them from model agencies, and then persuades them to take off their cloths. This often leads to sex, according to his own accounts.

Today then should be the best day of his life, because every few minutes a beautiful girl rings his doorbell, takes off her cloths and heads straight for the bedroom. Murphy's bed is soon so full of naked chicks he has to invite a cabdriver and two plumbers in to support him in satisfying them ... and even then the girls wear him out.

When another quartet of girls ring his doorbell, Murphy is hardly able to stand anymore - but even though these girls take off their cloths as well, they are not after sex but want revenge for all those he tricked - by forcing him to wear a babydoll nighty, high heels and ladies' underwear, then they put him on a leash, force him to lick their boots, spank his butt, and the like ...

In the end, Murphy claims he has learned his lesson - but he admits he has also learned to like the various fetishes the girls have introduced him to and announces that once he has recovered from this experience, he will invite some more models to his place ...

 

Most reviews describe this film as one of the most pathetic, disgusting, off-turning, simply bad softcore sex movie ever, mainly I guess due to the sheer presence of Ed Wood, who admittedly looks way past his prime in this one, visibly scarred by alcoholism, disgustingly out of shape, and yes, he does look pathetic in a baby doll nighty. However, the sorry state he's inn weirdly fits the role of the pathetic sleazeball he's playing, so whether or not you want to see old-and-ugly Ed Wood, he's hardly miscast in this one. And while Wood might no longer look his best in Love Feast, the girls pretty much all look gorgeous, and they all get naked and have the bodies to do so.

As for the script: It's silly, there are no two ways about it, but so were most sex movie scripts of the late 1960's in fact, but whatever plots these films had, they were only cheap excuses to get girls naked - and on this level, Love Feast totally delivers.

All that is not to say that Love Feast is a masterpiece, a must-see film, essentially it is just another cheap sexflick - but thanks to its oddball plot mixed with gorgeous naked girls and a not so gorgeous out-of-shape alcoholic, you might get a kick out of that one, actually more of a kick than out of many other movies of its ilk.

 

review © by Mike Haberfelner

 

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In times of uncertainty of a possible zombie outbreak, a woman has to decide between two men - only one of them's one of the undead.

 

There's No Such Thing as Zombies
starring
Luana Ribeira, Rudy Barrow and Rami Hilmi
special appearances by
Debra Lamb and Lynn Lowry

 

directed by
Eddie Bammeke

written by
Michael Haberfelner

produced by
Michael Haberfelner, Luana Ribeira and Eddie Bammeke

 

now streaming at

Amazon

Amazon UK

Vimeo

 

 

 

Robots and rats,
demons and potholes,
cuddly toys and
shopping mall Santas,
love and death and everything in between,
Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

is all of that.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to
-
a collection of short stories and mini-plays
ranging from the horrific to the darkly humourous,
from the post-apocalyptic
to the weirdly romantic,
tales that will give you a chill and maybe a chuckle, all thought up by
the twisted mind of
screenwriter and film reviewer
Michael Haberfelner.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

the new anthology by
Michael Haberfelner

 

Out now from
Amazon!!!