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Japan 1615: It's the Sanada clan vs the Tokugawa clan, fighting over
Ozawa castle, which Lord Sanada still holds, but not for long. So he
orders his bravest man, ninja Sasuke, to find the country's biggest
treasure ... for which he only has one half of the treasure map, and
unfortunately the other half is held by the Kirigakure clan, and that
clan's supreme ninja, lovely Kagore, is Sasuke's biggest enemy. During
their fight, the two of them get into an earthquake that throws them
forward in time, right into 1984. Sasuke finds himself torn out of time
and thrown onto a crowded train, something that didn't even exist in his
time ... but he is quick to adapt to local customs (local customs at least
to certain adult movies) and he quickly fondles the loveliest girl on the
train, Tsuta, to orgasm. Tsuta falls in love with him, gives him abode,
and slowly comes to the realization that he might really be from another
era. Thus he helps him in his treasure hunt. Kagore meanwhile finds
abode in a whorehouse where she becomes the most popular prostitute in a
manner of two days - but when she kills a yakuza for torturing one of the
other girls, she finds herself on the run. She takes a train where she is
fondled to orgasm by an actors' agent called Kirigakure, who is actually a
descendant of the Kirigakure clan and who has in his possession the other
part of the treasure map that Sasuke is currently looking for. Kirigakure
makes Kagore a star, but then she needs to perform on a TV show with
another girl ... and thus, Kirigakure takes the next train, fondles a girl
to orgasm, then offers her the job to go on a show with Sasuke - and
wouldn't you know it, that girl is Tsuta. When Kagore and Sasuke run
into each other again thanks to Tsuta, they immediately start their old
feud once more ... but soon have to realize that while they are valiant
fighters, they are worth shit when it comes to treasure hunting, and thus
they both have to trust Tsuta to decipher their treasure map ... and
eventually, they find Japan's biggest treasure, which they then celebrate
in the only way they know - on a train, fondling each other to orgasm of
course. Then an earthquake takes the three of them and their treasure back
to 1615, and they are so busy fondling each other they don't even notice
that their treasure falls right into the hands of Lord Tokugawa ... This
is not a film to be taken seriously, in fact it's silly and almost moronic
on almost every level: The story is hardly really thought through, the
timetravel subplot fails to ever really come together, and the film's
attitude towards groping on public trains - well ... but all that is
actually part of the film's potential, it's pure nonsense, free of all
pretense, and it's one big excuse to show pretty girls in various stages
of undress being fondled. This all makes Sexy Timetrip Ninjas no
masterpiece of course, it's more of a party film that ought to be watched
with mates and beer, and even in this category there are far better films
around. But it's worth quite a few chuckles at least, and that then is a
good thing, right?
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