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Clinger

USA 2015
produced by
Bubba Fish, Michael Steves, Harvey Cody (executive), Todd Smith (executive), Ada Young (executive) for Upstart Films
directed by Michael Steves
starring Vincent Martella, Jennifer Laporte, Julia Aks, Shonna Major, Alicia Monet Caldwell, Taylor Clift, Leah Henley, Paulie Deo jr, Rebecca Gail, Jeffrey Bean, Debbie Rochon, Lisa Wilcox, Sewell Whitney, Victoria Villarreal, Bobby C. King, Elizabeth Jackson, Ben Griffin, Michelle Elaine, April Littlejohn, Bart Stewart, Kyle Sparks, Adrianna Morse, Joshua Steves, Michael Bevan, Mel House, Bubba Fish, Kirby Sokolow
written by Michael Steves, Gabi Chennisi Duncombe, Bubba Fish, music by Misha Segal, special effects by Phil Nichols, edited by Bubba Fish

review by
Mike Haberfelner

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High school student Fern (Jennifer Laporte) is hell-bent to make it to the MIT for college based on being the fastest of runners on her school ... and then she meets Robert (Vincent Martella), the romantic loner with the guitar, and the two fall in love almost immediately. At first, everything's great, really, but eventually, Fern cannot handle the attention she's constantly getting from Robert anymore, as she's crowding her with gifts she doesn't even want, overwhelms her with gestures that are just too much for her, and above all crowds her when all she wants is to train to become good enough to make it to the MIT - which would of course mean moving to another city and leaving Robert behind. So eventually, when he has just finished preparations for their "2 months together" celebrations, she breaks up with him ... and somehow that thing he has created for festivities beautifully doubles as a guillotine, and it accidently but perfectly cuts his head of when Robert stumbles into it.

So that's a tragic end to Robert and Fern's relationship, but admittedly, Fern's not all that unhappy about it, being able to go on with her own life now. And then Robert returns as a ghost only she can see ... and at first, everything's great again, seems in death he has learned the lessons he didn't in life, and the two have even sex for the very first time ... which is great until Robert's head comes off, turning the affair into a bloody mess. Sure, that doesn't actually kill Robert as he's already a ghost, and the head can even be reattached ... it's just too much for Fern, and now she figures a relationship between the living and the dead cannot actually work - upon which Robert figures he has to kill her to win her back. Now Fern figures her only hope is her running coach and former ghostunter Valeria (Alicia Monet Caldwell), but she's totally off the hook, and the fact that in Fern's fight against Robert and his ghost friends even her sister's (Julia Aks) boyfriend (Paulie Deo jr) is killed by accident and returns as ghost doesn't help the situation. Plud, Fern's running try-out, and thus the chance to be accepted into MIT, is only days away ...

Genre fave Debbie Rochon plays Fern's mother.

 

Teen comedy with coming-of-age undercurrents, love story and gory horror flick all rolled into one - and it works out rather nicely, too, as the film stays by and large free of kitsch but is more than willing to go for silly jokes, the more gruesome scenes are really just that, gruesome, the characters are more than just clichés (though there's the occasional caricature in there somewhere), and the leads are fully fleshed out, the story as such is well-told with quite a few surprises, and the directorial effort is subtle for the most part but does give the audience what they want.

Good fun, really!

 

review © by Mike Haberfelner

 

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Robots and rats,
demons and potholes,
cuddly toys and
shopping mall Santas,
love and death and everything in between,
Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

is all of that.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to
-
a collection of short stories and mini-plays
ranging from the horrific to the darkly humourous,
from the post-apocalyptic
to the weirdly romantic,
tales that will give you a chill and maybe a chuckle, all thought up by
the twisted mind of
screenwriter and film reviewer
Michael Haberfelner.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

the new anthology by
Michael Haberfelner

 

Out now from
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On the same day
a Burglar wants to kill you
and your Ex wants
to make up ...
... and for the life of it,
you can't decide
WHICH IS WORSE!!!

 

A Killer Conversation

produced by and starring
Melanie Denholme
directed by
David V.G. Davies
written by
Michael Haberfelner
starring
Ryan Hunter and
Rudy Barrow

out now on DVD