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The Cook

USA 2013
produced by
Joshua Miller, Travis Miller, Jeremy Castaldo for Zenawood Entertainment
directed by Joshua Miller
starring Jeremy Castaldo, Amber Tranum, Ashley Elizabeth Pierce, Wade Blevins, Josh Emanuel, Trey Sweeten, Jamie Lee Fife, Kitt Bender, Stephen Miller, Kylie Wright, Cassandra Pickens, Gabriel Conduff, Libby Chancellor, Brad Claggett, Cyrus Crane, Corey Douglas, Kristina Flinn, Mathew Fasano, Samantha Fugate, Samantha Green, Jordan Hill, Randy Holmun, Charles Miller, Joshua Miller, Micah Miller, Susan Miller, Krista Nagle, Samantha Neal, Spencer Pogue, Adam Michael Wright, Logan Smith, Danny Overton, Kayla Overton, Michael Hart, Davis Hill, Frank Barrett
written by Joshua Miller, music by Jeremy Castaldo, special effects by Joshua Miller, Davis Hill

review by
Mike Haberfelner

Jim (Jeremy Castaldo) plays the lead in a popular TV series in which his character Jack and Sophie (Cassandra Pickens) seem to be made for one another, only everybody but the two of them seem to notice - a tension that keeps the series afloat week after week after week, until finally Jack proposes to Sophie ... with not all that great results.

Jim actually couldn't care less about the series, which he thinks highly contrived, totally being blind to the fact that his best friend forever Jena (Ashley Elizabeth Pierce) is in fact madly in love with him. Of course, since he doesn't know, that doesn't keep him from falling in love with Imogen (Amber Tranum) at a camping trip he actually came together with Jena - and he doesn't even understand that Jena's somewhat miffed about this. But this is really the least of their problems, because they are camping in the hunting grounds of The Cook (Wade Blevins), who's the only survivor of a suicide snake cult and who is creating his own drug out of snake poison that gives him wild and bizarre visions, makes him super-strong and next to indestcructible, and that turns him into an extremely brutal killer. So by the by, he kills of Jim, Jena and Imogen's friends without them even noticing before the three of them leave to a nearby cabin - which Jena sees herself forced to leave prematurely because of the situation ... and then she witnesses the Cook slaughtering people first hand - and escaping back to the cabin, she doesn't even realize that that way she makes Jim and Imogen logical future victims on the Cook's list ...


Ok, I have to admit, the plot of The Cook doesn't sound like much, and on the surface, the film actually follows familiar genre formulas almost to the T - but at the same time it's an absolutely bizarre film that has almost triplike quality due to its almost surreal murder sequences which not only play with all sorts of weird imagery and colour effects but are often deliberately presented out of sequence, and in an associative rather than factual way, while by no means sparing us any graphic details.

Quite probably the weirdest slasher movie you've ever seen, and not one you'd want to miss!


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Robots and rats,
demons and potholes,
cuddly toys and
shopping mall Santas,
love and death and everything in between,
Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

is all of that.


Tales to Chill
Your Bones to
a collection of short stories and mini-plays
ranging from the horrific to the darkly humourous,
from the post-apocalyptic
to the weirdly romantic,
tales that will give you a chill and maybe a chuckle, all thought up by
the twisted mind of
screenwriter and film reviewer
Michael Haberfelner.


Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

the new anthology by
Michael Haberfelner


Out now from




On the same day
a Burglar wants to kill you
and your Ex wants
to make up ...
... and for the life of it,
you can't decide


A Killer Conversation

produced by and starring
Melanie Denholme
directed by
David V.G. Davies
written by
Michael Haberfelner
Ryan Hunter and
Rudy Barrow

out now on DVD