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A Cena col Vampiro

Dinner with a Vampire

Italy 1988
produced by
Lamberto Bava, Massimo Manasse (executive), Marco Grillo Spina (executive) for Dania Film, Devon Film, Reteitalia
directed by Lamberto Bava
starring George Hilton, Patrizia Pellegrino, Riccardo Rossi, Isabel Russinova, Valeria Milillo, Yvonne Sciò, Daniele Aldrovandi, Igor Zaklewsky, Roberto Pedicini, Letizia Raco, Stefano Sabelli
story by Luciano Martino, screenplay by Lamberto Bava, Dardano Sacchetti, music by Simon Boswell, Mario Tagliaferri, special effects by Paolo Ricci

review by
Mike Haberfelner

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Jurek (George Hilton) is a 4000 year-old vampire, has grown wary of his existence and now he only wants to die ... problem is, his vampire instincts won't let him be killed just like that much less commit suicide, so he invites a singer, a dancer, an actor and an actress (who are by the way all terrible) to his castle promising them a role in his next horror film (he is also a movie director) - but actually he just wants them to find out how to kill him (he's immune to the crucifix, garlic and even a stake through the heart) and get it over with. Problem is, he will also be trying to kill them. The other problem is, our youngsters have no idea how to kill him, his only hints are that the secret has something to do with one of his films and with Dorian Gray ... which is not much of a hint at first, but after quite a number of shocks and chases, our youngsters figure out that he's only alive and kicking as long as the movie (a vampire movie by the way) exists - and just as Jurek mounts his final attack, they burn the film, and quite drastically, the vampire burns too and dies ...

 

As a horror movie, this film is a desaster: It's almost amazingly blunt (without being drastic), the script is just plain silly, there are no shocks as such, the whole thing is totally free of either suspense or atmosphere, George Hilton hams up his role as the baddie way too much, the other actors are just bad, and 80's hairdoes and fashion and the occasional piece of 80's synthie Euro pop doesn't help one bit either. My guess is though that this film was actually intended as a comedy ... as which it isn't much better, despite the occasional attempt at fun the film is almost joke-free, the timing is off and none of the actors seems to have any talent for comedy. What remains is just a bad film that's not even so bad it's good.

 

review © by Mike Haberfelner

 

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Robots and rats,
demons and potholes,
cuddly toys and
shopping mall Santas,
love and death and everything in between,
Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

is all of that.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to
-
a collection of short stories and mini-plays
ranging from the horrific to the darkly humourous,
from the post-apocalyptic
to the weirdly romantic,
tales that will give you a chill and maybe a chuckle, all thought up by
the twisted mind of
screenwriter and film reviewer
Michael Haberfelner.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

the new anthology by
Michael Haberfelner

 

Out now from
Amazon!!!

 

 

 

On the same day
a Burglar wants to kill you
and your Ex wants
to make up ...
... and for the life of it,
you can't decide
WHICH IS WORSE!!!

 

A Killer Conversation

produced by and starring
Melanie Denholme
directed by
David V.G. Davies
written by
Michael Haberfelner
starring
Ryan Hunter and
Rudy Barrow

out now on DVD