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Gladiator Eroticus

USA 2001
produced by
Michael Beckerman (= Michael Raso) for ei Independent Cinema (Seduction)
directed by John Bacchus
starring Darian Caine, Misty Mundae (= Erin Brown), John P. Fedele, Debbie Rochon, Jade Duboir, Esmerelda DeLaRocca (= Ruby LaRocca), Katie Jordon, A.J. Khan, Victoria Vega, John Link, Michael Raso (= Michael Beckerman), Heidi Christine, John Bacchus, Lilly Tiger
written by John Bacchus

review by
Mike Haberfelner

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Available on DVD!

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Ancient Rome: General Eroticus (Darian Caine), who has just fought a victorious battle against the barbarians, is offered succession to the throne by the emperor, but she refuses, as she rather wants to return to her home Lesbius. But once there, she finds out it has been torn down to make spance for Roman Projects. In desperation, she is caught by Fellatio (Debbie Rochon - "Despite my name, I don't suck !"), who has her trained by Orgasmus (Jade Duboir) to become a successful lesbian gladiator (which is pretty much the same as an ordinary gladiator, only instead of fighting, a lesbian gladiator has lesbian sex). 

Back in Rome, the emperor has meanwhile been killed by his son Dickus Minimus (John P.Fedele), who knows only Eroticus can challenge his succession to the throne. 

& as fate goes, Fellatio's lesbian circus, after a successful run in the provinces, comes to Rome, with Eroticus its main attraction, & of course Dickus Minimus soon finds that out & has her incarcerated. But his sister Clitoris (Misty Mundae) feels initially attracted to the lesbian gladiator, & - with the help of her chambermaid (Ruby LaRocca), tries to find out more about lesbian love. 

Infuriated by that - since he had designs on his sister himself - Dickus Minimus decides to have Eroticus face real gladiators in her next battle. Eroticus of course can win the battle ... but not the crowd, until she publicly seduces Clitoris. It all ends in an orgy.

Victoria Vega, A.J.Khan & the delectable Katie Jordon have silent but naked roles as lesbian gladiators.

 

When in 2001 the overblown, insignificant & forgettable peplum Gladiator (2000) won multiple Oscars (among them for best picture), it did become evident that that award-show had reached a new low. When in 2001 Seduction Cinema's John Bacchus did this erotic spoof however, one had to realize Gladiator had at least one good thing about it - that it made this parody possible. 

Bacchus' lesbian spoofs of big budget Hollywood blockbusters are known to often be better than the originals they are based on (not that that would be too hard), & Gladiator Eroticus is one of his very best: here the erotic & the comic elements are carefully outbalanced, with actresses who not only look different from your middle-of-the-road erotic flick-chick, but are also talented enough to carry a funny story, with weird but wonderful male supporting performances (John P.Fedele, who just knows how to be funny, & Michael L.Raso & the incomparably strange John Link as senators), & with a genuine talent to make the most out of its very limited budget, actually use it to the movie's advantage.

 

review © by Mike Haberfelner

 

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Thanks for watching !!!

 

 

In times of uncertainty of a possible zombie outbreak, a woman has to decide between two men - only one of them's one of the undead.

 

There's No Such Thing as Zombies
starring
Luana Ribeira, Rudy Barrow and Rami Hilmi
special appearances by
Debra Lamb and Lynn Lowry

 

directed by
Eddie Bammeke

written by
Michael Haberfelner

produced by
Michael Haberfelner, Luana Ribeira and Eddie Bammeke

 

now streaming at

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Robots and rats,
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Tales to Chill
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Tales to Chill
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a collection of short stories and mini-plays
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Tales to Chill
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