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A record breaker at the Golden Rhaspberry Awards 2008, winning
an unprecedented 8 Razzies, in almost every category it was
nominated (including worst picture, worst director, worst screenplay and
worst actress Lindsay Lohan) - though this record seems to be somewhat
fabricated since Lohan won two Razzies for the worst performance
(she plays a dual role) even though she was only nominated once, so go
figure. But probably the whole award shower had more to do with Lindsay
Lohan bashing, which became quite fashionable in early 2008, and with
gloating over the film's poor box office performance than anything else. So
the question remains: Is the film really that bad? Yes and now, in my
view, it's a bad movie alright, but it's not that bad, at least not in
every department: First of all, Lindsay Lohan is no good actress, we all
know that - but at least she has enough charisma to carry the movie - not
always an easy task, which you will see. Secondly the direction by Chris
Sivertson is impersonal and functional at best - so no worse than many an Academy
Award winner of recent years. Thirdly though, the script ... oh boy -
but see for yourself:
The film actually starts out quite interesting and intelligent: Model
student Aubrey is kidnapped one day and nowhere to be found, and only the
audience knows she was brutally cut up by some maniac or other (which is
shown in great detail, so at least the film doesn't shy away from gore).
Later Aubrey is found, with one hand and one leg missing, and is rushed
off to a hospital - but when she is questioned by the FBI and is reunited
with her parents (Julia Ormond, Neal McDonough), she claims she isn't
Aubrey the model student at all but a stripper called Dakota - even if DNA
tests prove the opposite. Since nobody believes her and Aubrey's parents
even let her stay with them, she is starting investigations on her own and
... and here it gets silly: Dakota finds out that she has to be Aubrey's
identical twin and is suffering from identical twin stigmata - which means
because the madman cut off Aubrey's hand and leg, she just spontaneously
lost hers as well ... what? Eventually, Aubrey's father admits that he
has brought identical twins to the USA from New Zealand (why New Zealand?)
after her wife's baby died, and while Aubrey was placed in mommy's care
instead of the dead baby, Dakota was left with some drug addict (who
accepted the baby as hers exactly because?). Anyways, obviously,
Aubrey's tormentor has something to do with some award that is always kept
out of Aubrey's reach (?), but eventually, on a graveyard, she gets her
hands on it and knows exactly where Aubrey is held right away - as it is a
piano-playing award so the killer must be Aubrey's piano teacher (Thomas
Tofel) because ... The problem is though that Aubrey is presently being
buried alive, and once she suffocates this is the end of Dakota as well
(you know, the identical twin stigmata thing) - which means Dakota has to
rush to her rescue, and of course, she first has to fight and defeat
Aubrey's piano teacher ... which she does, and in the end, she digs up
Aubrey just in time to save her life. So yes, the Razzie for
worst screenplay was absolutely justified, as it contains a wagonload of
unlikely, unreasonable plottwists even the giallo-genre (the Italian
version of the serial killer murder mystery, known for its many unlikely
and unreasonable plottwists) would have shied away from, and obviously, it
sunk the whole movie with it: Even a much better actress than Lindsay
Lohan, a much better director than Chist Sivertson would not have been
able to turn the film around. The final question: Is the movie any
good? Well, it's good for a laugh, that's for sure, but it's not
something you should watch - though admittedly, I have seen much worse
(but also much funnier). Oh, and by the way, the fact that
Lindsay lohan plays a stripper doesn't mean whe gets naked int he film,
actually, she just does a lame dance routine in a supposedly sexy outfit -
without stripping anything.
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