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Euer Weg führt durch die Hölle

Jungle Warriors
Jungle Fever / The Czar of Brazil

Mexico/West Germany 1984
produced by
Ernst R. von Theumer, Monica Teuber, Francisco Araiz-Condoy (executive) for Tatfilm, Jungle Warrior, Araiz-Condoy Productions, International Screen Productions, Popular Films
directed by Ernst R. von Theumer
starring Nina Van Pallandt, Paul L.Smith, John Vernon, Alex Cord, Sybil Danning, Marjoe Gortner, Woody Strode, Kai Wulff, Dana Elcar, Suzi Horne, Mindi Iden, Kari Lloyd, Ava Cadell, Myra Chason, Angela Robinson, Dominic Barto, Louisa Morith, Nicolás Jasso, Emilio Messina, Ray Victor, Isabel Vázquez La Chichimecca, José Zambrano, Milton Rodríguez, Rogelio González III
written by Ernst R. von Theumer, Robert Collector, music by Roland Baumgartner

review by
Mike Haberfelner

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Joanna (Nina Van Pallandt) and Ben (Kai Wulff) take photographer Larry (Marjoe Gortner) and his models deep into the Amazon jungle by airplane, where Larry insists to do a shoot despite the fact that the whole area is controlled by drug kingpin Cesar (Paul L.Smith) and his sister Angel (Sybil Danning), and they just don't like strangers on their turf ... so soon enough, the airplane is shot down and Cesar's men hunt down the intruders, a chase during which Larry meets his end by a booby trap.

Ben, Joanna and the models are brought to Cesar, who at first plays the perfect host ... until he decapitates Ben in front of everyone and has the girls raped by his men. Thing is, Cesar is just in negotiations with a Mafia boss, Vito (John Vernon), and he doesn't need any interruptions by a bunch of models, especially since one of them is an FBI agent. This of course is the girls' only chance once they have made it out of ther cell thanks to an old Indio woman (Isabel Vázquez La Chichimeca) ... and while our FBI agent is radioing for help and picking up a few loose ends, the other girls arm themselves and start a shoot-out - which in turn convinces Vito that he has walked into a trap, and before you know it, he and his men engage in a shoot-out with Cesar and his men ... and when the police helicopters finally arrive to pick up the girls, pretty much all the baddies are dead anyways.


What can I say ? It's trash-as-trash-can of course, what else do you expect when you mix a bunch of models, the amazon jungle, gangsters and machineguns and add Sybil Danning to it ?

So of course, Jungle Warriors is not a masterpiece, it's not even a good movie in any sense of the word - it's badly written, badly directed, badly filmed, underbudgeted and chock-full of clichés -, but if you like your action (unintentionally) silly, you might probably still have a good time watching this.


By the way, Marjoe Gortner's role was originally to be played by the great Dennis Hopper, who was allegedly fired because of drug-related causes ... which is probably all the better, since he would have seemed a bit out-of-place in a crappy film like this.


review © by Mike Haberfelner


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Robots and rats,
demons and potholes,
cuddly toys and
shopping mall Santas,
love and death and everything in between,
Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

is all of that.


Tales to Chill
Your Bones to
a collection of short stories and mini-plays
ranging from the horrific to the darkly humourous,
from the post-apocalyptic
to the weirdly romantic,
tales that will give you a chill and maybe a chuckle, all thought up by
the twisted mind of
screenwriter and film reviewer
Michael Haberfelner.


Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

the new anthology by
Michael Haberfelner


Out now from




On the same day
a Burglar wants to kill you
and your Ex wants
to make up ...
... and for the life of it,
you can't decide


A Killer Conversation

produced by and starring
Melanie Denholme
directed by
David V.G. Davies
written by
Michael Haberfelner
Ryan Hunter and
Rudy Barrow

out now on DVD