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Lemmy pour les Dames

Ladies' Man
Das ist nichts für kleine Mädchen

France 1962
produced by
Compagnie Industrielle et Commerciale Cinématographique (= CICC), Films Borderie
directed by Bernard Borderie
starring Eddie Constantine, Francoise Brion, Claudine Coster, Eliane D'Almeida, Yvonne Monlaur, Lionel Roc, Jacques Hilling, Paul Mercey, Jean-Marc Allègre, Guy Delorme, Jacques Berthier, Robert Berri
screenplay by Marc-Gilbert Sauvajon, Bernard Borderie, based on the novel by Peter Cheyney, music by Paul Misraki

Lemmy Caution

review by
Mike Haberfelner

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Actually Lemmy Caution (Eddie Constantine) only wanted to spend a quiet vacation on the Côte D'Azur, but no such luck: First, he is chased up and down several streets by (exclusively female) fans (predating a very similar scene in A Hard Day's Night by a few years), and as soon as he has gotten rid of them, a woman, Claudia Ferguson (Yvonne Monlaur) asks him for help, to which he reluctantly agrees. But when he next meets her, she is already dead, and a tape on which she admits suicide turns out to be a crude fake.

Soon enough, Lemmy finds Claudia's friends, Marie-Christine (Francoise Brion), Francoise (Claudine Coster) and Sophie (Eliane d'Almeda), all the wives of important ambassadors (just like Claudia), and it doesn't take Lemmy long to figure there's something wrong with them.

In the meantime, several attempts are made on Lemmy's life, which he all survives though singlehandedly, and he even has enough breath left in him to beat up Mirko (Guy Delorme) & Hugo (Lionel Roc), friends of the girls he holds responsible for trying to kill him.

Eventually, Lemmy finds out the terrible secret of the girls: Once many years ago, they went to a drug den with their friend Ingrid, but Ingrid's faint heart could not take the drugs and died on them. Terribly afraid to cause a scandal, the other four girls, (Claudia, Marie-Christine, Francoise and Sophie) through her into the sea to make it look like suicide ... unfortunately, when the corpse is found, it is found out she did not die from the drugs but drowned after her friends threw her into the water ... For years, the girls were doing fine all the same, but then someone seemed to have tracked them down and blackmailed them - but not for money but some secrets the girls get from their ambassador husbands. But Lemmy also figures that one of the girls has to be in league with the blackmailer ...

Eventually Lemmy finds out that Nollet (Jacques Bertier), the girls' private doctor, is the blackmailer, but before he can do anything, he is locked into the villain's fall-out-shelter (actually a giant safe) with his clumsy sidekick Dombie (Robert Berri).

Of course Lemmy finds a way out, and when he finally has caught up with Nollet, he has also figured out which one of the girls (Francoise in case you wondered) was helping him. And as usual in Lemmy Caution films, the villains get their just desserts in the end (served of course by Lemmy), but the other two girls, Marie-Christine and Sophie, he lets off scot-free ... but he might come by later to get his little reward.


The films of the Lemmy Caution-series were never to be taken seriously, they were rather a parody on the crime and espionage genre, with Eddie Constantine playing his hard-drinking, hard-hitting, womanizing hero always tongue-in-cheek. However, with the series progressing (and Lemmy pour les Dames is already film number seven) the series started more and more to spoof even itself, and in that respect, it makes perfect sense that the secret agent Lemmy Caution fans from his female fans and asks for whisky in almost every scene (acutally I can't name another film in which the word whisky is said quite as frequently), but despite his heavy drinking, he keeps his head clear enough to get the villain in the end.

Consequently, as a crime-movie, Lemmy pour les Dames is rather unsatisfying, but as comedy/(self-)parody ... how can one not laugh.


review © by Mike Haberfelner


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Robots and rats,
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shopping mall Santas,
love and death and everything in between,
Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

is all of that.


Tales to Chill
Your Bones to
a collection of short stories and mini-plays
ranging from the horrific to the darkly humourous,
from the post-apocalyptic
to the weirdly romantic,
tales that will give you a chill and maybe a chuckle, all thought up by
the twisted mind of
screenwriter and film reviewer
Michael Haberfelner.


Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

the new anthology by
Michael Haberfelner


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On the same day
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A Killer Conversation

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directed by
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written by
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out now on DVD