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Das Mädchen mit der heissen Masche

French Pussycat
Loves of a French Pussycat

West Germany 1972
produced by
Elio Romano for Romano Film
directed by Hans Billian
starring Sybil Danning, Michael Cromer, Marlene Appelt, Katja Büchele, Ulla Kopa, Fernando Gómez, Heinz Peter Schuck, Olga Bringmann, Felicitas Peters, Nino Korda
written by Hans Billian

review by
Mike Haberfelner

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Rolf (MIchael Cromer) is the country's leading sex columnist, but he has one problem: He just can't keep himself from shagging - and all the women he meets are so young and beautiful, too, and they let him shag them without reservations.

Doesn't sound like too much of a problem?

Well, not for him maybe, but his current girlfriend Susanne leaves him because of it, and because he wouldn't propose to her. In her desperation, Susanne moves in with her best friend, the promiscuous Andrea (Sybil Danning), who figures she can get Rolf to propose to her and makes a bet with Susanne ...

The next morning, Andrea shows up on Rolf's doorstep to apply as his maid. She's a stunner, so Rolf hires her right away and tries to get into her panties, but she just won't let him, but teases him without end, constantly drops in when he shags someone else, invites boyfriends over to make him jealous, walks around in the nude or seminude in front of him and the like. It works, because Rolf gets more and more fixated on her, while his interest in other women slowly fades ... but rather unexpectedly, Andrea starts feeling something for Rolf as well.

The finale has Rolf in bed with two women, pretty much unable to perform, and Andrea with a (fake) boyfriend pretending to mistreat her, and Susanne coming back to Rolf's place to sort things out - which all leads to a big mix-up including the repertory naked girls hiding under beds and the like, a fistfight, and a fake suicide attempt at Rolf's behalf which is cut short by Andrea giving herself up to him. When Andrea finds out the suicide attempt was only a fake though, she thinks she has been duped and runs away, but in the end, Rolf really proposes to her, and they lived happily ever after ... well, maybe.

 

An early 1970's German sex comedy that pretty much delivers what you'd expect: A childish, overly simplistic plotline, bad slapstick, age-old dirty jokes, horrible horrible dialogue full of painful oneliners, quite a few actors not up to their job, and the like. On their other hand, there also quite a few very beautiful ladies who (it seems) can't wait to take their cloths off, and some of the (early 70's style) sexy outfits the girls wear are simply priceless. So no, this is by no means an even marginally "good" movie, but if you're into campy vintage erotica, you'll at least get a certain kick out of it.

 

review © by Mike Haberfelner

 

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In times of uncertainty of a possible zombie outbreak, a woman has to decide between two men - only one of them's one of the undead.

 

There's No Such Thing as Zombies
starring
Luana Ribeira, Rudy Barrow and Rami Hilmi
special appearances by
Debra Lamb and Lynn Lowry

 

directed by
Eddie Bammeke

written by
Michael Haberfelner

produced by
Michael Haberfelner, Luana Ribeira and Eddie Bammeke

 

now streaming at

Amazon

Amazon UK

Vimeo

 

 

 

Robots and rats,
demons and potholes,
cuddly toys and
shopping mall Santas,
love and death and everything in between,
Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

is all of that.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to
-
a collection of short stories and mini-plays
ranging from the horrific to the darkly humourous,
from the post-apocalyptic
to the weirdly romantic,
tales that will give you a chill and maybe a chuckle, all thought up by
the twisted mind of
screenwriter and film reviewer
Michael Haberfelner.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

the new anthology by
Michael Haberfelner

 

Out now from
Amazon!!!