Die Sex-Abenteuer der Drei Musketiere
The Sex Adventures of the Three Musketeers
West Germany 1971
Erwin C. Dietrich for Avco
directed by Erwin C. Dietrich (as Michael Thomas)
starring Peter Graf, Ingrid Steeger, Nadia Pilar, Li Huber, Rico Petr, Alfed Codona, Loni Grunwald, Yvonne Sollin, Raphael Britten, Achim Hammer, Jürg Coray, Thomas Larisch
written by Erwin C. Dietrich (as Manfred Gregor), based on characters created by Alexandre Dumas père, music by Walter Baumgartner, Peter Hedrich, cinematography by Peter Baumgartner, Andreas Demmer
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Young D'Artagnan (Peter Graf) has just been made a man by a gypsy woman
(Li Huber), and now he already has two lovers, a blonde (Ingrid Steeger)
for the day out in the fields and a dark haired one for the night in
bed.Eventually, his father opposes to his shagging around too much and
sends young D'Artagnan off to Paris to become a Musketeer ...
On his way to Paris, D'Artagnan meets the legendary Three Musketeers
(Achim Hammer, Jürg Coray, Thomas Larisch), but they are nothing more
than a trio of drunkards and womanizers who roam the countryside to find
someone to fuck, and they in one scene don't even shy away from killing
the Count de Voyeur (Alfred Codona), just to have him out of the way to
shag his beautiful wife.
Eventually, D'Artagnan becomes a Musketeer, which is when he crosses
paths with the Countess de Voyeur, who invites him to her home and her bed
... and soon enough has locked him in to be her sex slave. It takes quite
some time before D'Artagnan manages to escape the Countess' clutches ...
and when hiding out in a stable during his escape, he bumps into the gypsy
who took his virginity again and realizes that woman might be his destiny
A very stupid sexploitation pic, obviously made on the cheap (to
a point where, in several scenes, the Musketeers who are supposed to
ride horses can be clearly seen sitting on their saddles with no horses
underneath) and based on an extremely feeble script that doesn't have much
use for Alexandre Dumas' original story, instead is nothing more than a
succession of sex scenes in period costume.
All that said, Die Sex-Abenteuer der Drei Musketiere is quite
naturally a bad film ... but if you are into stupid early 1970's erotica,
you might just as well enjoy this little movie ...