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Creep Tales
USA 1986
produced by Michael Minton, Jess Sherman, Doug DeGroot (executive) for Third Stone Productions, Productions West
directed by Ken Mandel (segment Halloween Night), Roger Nygard (segment Warped), Tim Boxell (segment Snatcher), Greg Middleton, Stephen Hegyes (segment The Closet), James Salisbury (segment Groovy Ghoulie Garage), Steve Hegyi (segment Howling Nightmare), Rod Slane (segment Sucker)
starring segment Halloween Night: Jess Sherman, Michael Minton, Tim Choate; segment Warped: Jennifer Barlow, Scott Hanson, Frances Marshall, Kay Bonner Nee; segment Snatcher: J.Renee Gilbert, Tom Kenny; segment The Closet: Sam Hall, Mark Weatherby; segment Groovy Ghoulie Garage: Peter Ortell, Christopher Prestia; segment Howling Nightmare: John Kozak, Bill Haslick; segment Sucker: Melanie Fry, Bill Orten, Greg Roach
written by Michael Minton, Jess Sherman (segment Halloween Night); Jeff Copeland, Roger Nygard (segment Warped); Tim Boxell (segment Snatcher); Stephen Hegyes, Greg Middleton (segment The Closet); James Salisbury, Philip Salisbury (segment Groovy Ghoulie Garage); Steve Hegyi (segment Howling Nightmare)
review by Mike Haberfelner
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A collection of short horror stories, framed by a story called Halloween
Night, in which a bunch of monsters steal a horror video from a grave
- but the owner rises from his coffin to retrieve the tape.
- The first story on this tape is Warped, about a woman
(Frances Marshall) who has lost her baby, and now she wants revenge on
her cousin (Jennifer Barlow), because it was her father who has raped
and impregnated her ...
- In Snatcher, a handbag thief (Tom Kenny) steals the handbag
of an old lady (J.Renee Gilbert), but then the handbag eats him (no
joke).
- In The Closet, a boy (Sam Hall) believes there's a monster in
his closet, only
his brother (Mark Weatherby) won't believe him - until he's eaten by
the monster.
- In Groovy Ghoulie Garage, a bunch of youngsters (Peter
Ortell, Christopher Prestia) go to a Halloween party in a little
village after their car has broken down - to find out they have been
timewarped back to 1969.
- Howling Nightmare is a werewolf story, not much more to say
about that one.
- Sucker has a broom salesman (Bill Orten) sell a magical dust
sucker to a mean housewife (Melanie Fry), a dust sucker that feeds
everything she sucks up right to her body until she becomes a fat
monster. Then her hubby (Greg Roach) comes home, and when she wants to
suck him away as well, she instead gives him a perfect body - so she
uses the sucker on herself ... and sucks herself from the face of the
earth.
A rather weak low budget horror anthology that mostly lacks vision to
cross genre lines, instead tells often-told tales yet again - but let me
get into more detail here: Halloween Night, the framing story, is
probably the most pathetic and badly acted piece of horror comedy ever
committed to film, it's so bad even that it totally ruins its plot that
could have been good at least for a laugh or two if handled with at least
a trace of subtlety. Warped is a soap opera, dressed up as horror,
and it's about as good (or bad) as I make it sound. Snatcher has an
amusing premise, but an unnecessarily long and uninteresting setup in
which nothing is established but the fact that this handbag thief steals
handbags (which I'm sure most of you must have gathered from his mere job
description, right?). The Closet doesn't have much of a story, and
even less in the surprise department. Groovy Ghoulie Garage does
have a story at least, but it's not in the least creepy but is supposed to
be. Howling Nightmare is not bad in its simplicity - but not too
good, either. The one crowning achievement of the whole film though is Sucker,
a mean little tale full of hindsight, surprise twists and bitter satire
that might not be exactly convincing in the special effects department but
more than makes up storywise ... and somehow, Sucker feels it
should have been in another, better movie.
In all, you might find yourself liking the last one or two stories in this
film, but be warned about the rest ...
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review © by Mike Haberfelner
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Robots and rats,
demons and potholes, cuddly toys and shopping mall Santas,
love and death and everything in between,
Tales to Chill Your Bones to is all of that.
Tales to Chill Your Bones to -
a collection of short stories and mini-plays ranging from the horrific to the darkly humourous,
from the post-apocalyptic to the weirdly romantic,
tales that will give you a chill and maybe a chuckle,
all thought up by the twisted mind of screenwriter and film reviewer Michael Haberfelner.
Tales to Chill Your Bones to
the new anthology by Michael Haberfelner
Out now from Amazon!!! |
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