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House of the Long Shadows
UK 1983
produced by Menahem Golan, Yoram Globus for Cannon
directed by Pete Walker
starring Vincent Price, Christopher Lee, Peter Cushing, Desi Arnaz jr, John Carradine, Sheila Keith, Julie Peasgood, Richard Todd, Louise English, Richard Hunter, Norman Rossington
screenplay by Michael Armstrong, based on the novel Seven Keys to Baldpate by Earl Derr Biggers and the adapted play by George M. Cohan, music by Richard Harvey
Seven Keys to Baldpate
review by Mike Haberfelner
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Kenneth (Desi Arnaz jr) bets with his publisher Sam (Richard Todd) that
he can write a worthwhile novel in a mere 24 hours for quite a sizeable
sum - and Sam is forthcoming enough to provide Kenneth with a mansion that
supposedly hasn't been lived in for 40 years to do just that. But arriving
at the mansion, Kenneth is to his surprise welcomed by a couple of
caretakers, Elijah (John Carradine) and his daughter Victoria (Sheila
Keith), who seem to be rather annoyed by his arrival but let him stay
anyhow. Soon after, pretty Mary stops by to warn him the mansion is
the headquarters of a terrorist organisation and he ought to leave
immediately - but he doesn't quite believe her, and it soon turns out
she's actually Sam's secretary sent after Kenneth to prevent him from
writing his novel. Kenneth likes her and so lets her stay, but soon enough
there are more new arrivals, Sebastian (Peter Cushing) and Lionel
(Christopher Lee) - and it soon turns out they, as well as the alleged
caretakers are all members of the Grisbane family, once the owners of the
mansion, convened for a family reunion. Then Corrigan arrives, the future
owner of the mansion, and demands what's going on with all the strangers
on his prospective property - and soon finds out that the Grisbanes had a
brother whom they locked up in his room forty years ago after at age 14 he
killed a village girl, and whom they are to release this midnight -
fearing of course that he has since turned into a homicidal madman. But
when they open his room they find him gone. Two more newcomers (Louise
English, Richard Hunter) claim they have been attacked by a madman, making
their way through the countryside, and they're soon gruesomely killed,
after which the Grisbane family members die like flies - and with all of
them gone it's revealed that Corrigan is actually the brother who has been
locked away, and who now proceeds to kill Kenneth and Mary as well - but
Kenneth can kill him in self-defense ... upon which everybody comes to
life again and everything turns out to have been a ruse to keep Kenneth
from ever writing his novel - apparently successfully so, until we the
watchers learn what just has transpired was actually Kenneth's novel which
he had managed to write in the mansion's peace and quiet in the last 24
hours. And even though she was only a figment of his imagination, in the
end Kenneth gets the girl - Mary - as well ... Now Earl Derr
Biggers' Seven Keys to Baldpate from 1913 is pretty much a textbook
example of how to write a light-footed mystery novel that remains fresh to
this very day, a mere 111 years later. Now House of the Long Shadows
on the other hand comes across as awkwardly heavy-handed and really as
pretty old-fashioned for 1983. Now sure, it's great to see no less than
four horror legends squaring off against one another, and their acting at
least is flawless, but the story just seems to be meandering, and
substituting the straight-forward crime plotline of the original for a
very far-fetched horror one doesn't do the thing any good, as do the
somewhat empty characters and lack of character motivation. And truth to
be told, Desi Arnaz jr and Julie Peasgood make a rather pale lead couple.
Now due to the presence of Carradine, Price, Lee and Cushing the true
horror fan will find plenty to like in this movie (I know I did), but
that's just not enough to make a good film.
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