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Pagan Island

USA 1960
produced by
Barry Mahon for Cinema Syndicate
directed by Barry Mahon
starring Eddie Dew, Nani Maka, Trine Hovelrud, Allison Louise Downe, Sharon Michael, Dolores Carlos, Yda Alvarez, Barbara Bordeaux, Dorothy Ford, Jo Anne Geary, Bud Irwin, Gina Kendall, Yanka Mann, June Marko, Lillian Melek, Fran Stacey, Jackie Terrell
screenplay by Clelle Mahon, casting by Bunny Yeager

review by
Mike Haberfelner

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Available on DVD!

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Shipwrecked sailor Stanton (Eddie Dew) is washed ashore an island populated merely by (white) women who hate men - especially white men -, and thus the island's Queen Kealoha (Trine Hovelsrud) soon enough has him drugged and sentenced to death. It is only when a group of warriors from a neighbouring island attack and Stanton shoots them all with his gun to defend the women that he is granted his freedom and gets the Queen's respect.

The Queen allows Stanton to remain on the island until he is fully recovered and able to go back to his world, and she also grants him the services of all the girls - all the girls but Nani Maka (Nani Maka), who is to be married (= sacrificed) to the Sea God and must remain untouched until then.

Of course, it is unavoidable that Stanton and Nani Maka fall in love with each other, and soon enough, they plead for Nani Maka's freedom - something the queen simply won't grant. So Stanton decides to be sacrificed alongside Nani Maka, but of course he really has planned for them to escape together once they are handed over to the Sea God - meaning being pushed into the water. However, when he and Nani Maka try to dive away, Nani Maka's leg gets caught in a giant clam and drowns ... so the Sea God has taken heer after all.

 

Of course this is dirt cheap sexploitation, early 1960's style - so in this film, the beautiful female islanders do run around topless but wear flower garlands around their necks which are supposed to cover their nipples (which, even though the women desperately try to hold the garlands in place when they move, is rather hopeless). And of course, Pagan Island is what you would call a bad film, it features a ridiculous plot, minimal production values and uniformly bad actors - with Trine Hovelsrud as Queen Kealoha being by far the worst of the bunch.

At the same time though, the film is nothing short of a hoot to watch, it's hilarious just because of its shortcomings, be it the bad plot, the flower garlands, the cheap sets, or Trine Hovelsrud acting. Bad yes, but also totally enjoyable ...

 

review © by Mike Haberfelner

 

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Thanks for watching !!!

 

 

In times of uncertainty of a possible zombie outbreak, a woman has to decide between two men - only one of them's one of the undead.

 

There's No Such Thing as Zombies
starring
Luana Ribeira, Rudy Barrow and Rami Hilmi
special appearances by
Debra Lamb and Lynn Lowry

 

directed by
Eddie Bammeke

written by
Michael Haberfelner

produced by
Michael Haberfelner, Luana Ribeira and Eddie Bammeke

 

now streaming at

Amazon

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Vimeo

 

 

 

Robots and rats,
demons and potholes,
cuddly toys and
shopping mall Santas,
love and death and everything in between,
Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

is all of that.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to
-
a collection of short stories and mini-plays
ranging from the horrific to the darkly humourous,
from the post-apocalyptic
to the weirdly romantic,
tales that will give you a chill and maybe a chuckle, all thought up by
the twisted mind of
screenwriter and film reviewer
Michael Haberfelner.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

the new anthology by
Michael Haberfelner

 

Out now from
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